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Humor About Women Vol.7
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A mother need only step into
the shower to
be instantly
reassured she is indispensable to every member of her
family. |
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TORTURE IT
Young woman sat down in small
restaurant, a waitress
came over to take her order.
"I'll have a hamburger please."
"Burger!" she yelled over her shoulder.
Then woman added. "Make it well done."
Waitres turned away again. "Torture it!" she yelled. |
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Question: Why is a modem better than
a
woman?
Answer: A modem doesn't mind if you
talk to other modems. A modem doesn't
complain if you sit and play at the computer all night. A modem will
sit
patiently and wait by the phone. A modem comes with an instruction
manual.
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CLOSE ENOUGH
A young woman with a happy, cheerful
voice was working
in her husband's trucking line office. She answered a phone call from a
trucker asking for directions to the terminal. After a short
conversation,
he said he could hardly wait to meet her. "I just know you are small,
blond
with blue eyes," he said. "No," young woman replied, "I'm tall,
brunette
and have brown eyes." "Close enough!" said the trucker. |
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Question:
How many
feminists does it take
to screw in a light bulb?
Answer:
That's not
funny.
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SOMEONE HAS TO STAY
BEHIND
After reading an article in the
evening paper about
women living longer than men, an old man commented, "I wonder why men
go
first?" His wife had an explanation: "Someone has to stay behind to pick up the
clothes!"
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Send
a link or joke to a friend
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HOT THINGS
The not especially sweet tempered young
wife approached her husband
James concerning the matter of one hundred dollars or so.
"I'd like to let you have it, my dear,"
began the husband, "but the
fact is I haven't that amount in the bank this morning—that is to say,
I haven't that amount to spare, in as much as I must take up a note for
two hundred dollars this afternoon."
"Oh, very well, James!" said the wife, with
an ominous calmness, "If
you think the man who holds the note can make things any hotter for you
than I can, do as you say, James!" |
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WITNESS
A man had been arrested on a charge of
beating and cruelly
misusing
his wife. After hearing the charge against the prisoner, the justice
turned
to the first witness.
"Madam," he said, "if this man
were your
husband and had given you a
beating, would you call in the police?"
The woman addressed, a veritable
Amazon in
size and aggressiveness,
turned a smiling countenance towards the justice and answered:
"No,
judge.
If he was mah husban', and he treated me lak he did 'is wife, Ah
wouldn't
call no p'liceman. No, sah, Ah'd call de mortician." |
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