Get All Travel Info


Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?

Ralph Waldo Emerson: It didn't cross the road; it transcended it.

B.F. Skinner:Because the external influences which had pervaded its sensorium from birth had caused it to develop in such a fashion that it would tend to cross roads, even while believing these actions to be of its own free will.

Johann Friedrich Von Goethe: The eternal hen-principle made it do it.

Pyrrho the Skeptic: What road?

Henry David Thoreau:To live deliberately... and suck all the marrow out of life.

David Hume: Out of custom and habit.

Malcom X: It was coming home to roost.

Ludwig Wittgenstein: 
The possibility of crossing was encoded into the objects chicken and road, and circumstances came into being which caused the actualization of this potential occurrence.

John Sun: The Air Force was only too happy to provide the transportation, so quite understandably the chicken availed himself of the opportunity.

The Sphinx: You tell me.

Mark Twain: The news of its crossing has been greatly exaggerated.

Ruskin: For different kinds of good weather.

Addison: For mysterious love and  uncertain treasure.

Policeman: Why didn't you tell me before?

Bride: Because it wants to be married.

Douglas Jerrold: Because it is so fond of ill-luck that it will run half-way to meet it.

Send a link or joke to a friend
The poultry farmer decided to give special attention to the development of his poultry yard, and he undertook the work carefully and systematically. His hired man, who had been with him for a number of years, was instructed, among other things, to write on each egg the date laid and the breed of the hen. After a month, the hired man resigned.
"I can't understand," the farmer declared, surprised and pained, "why you should want to leave."
"I'm through," the hired man asserted. "I've done the nastiest jobs, an' never kicked. But I draw the line on bein' secretary to a bunch o' hens."
The witness was obviously a rustic and quite new to the ways of a court-room. So, the judge directed him:  "Speak to the jury, sir—the men sitting behind you on the benches."
The witness turned, bowed clumsily and said:
"Good-morning, gentlemen."
Up in rural Minnesota Mr. Olsen, a poor farmer, had a cow killed by a railroad train. At the appropriate time the claim agent for the railroad called.  "We understand, of course, that the deceased was a very docile and valuable animal," said the claim agent in his most persuasive claim-politely manner "and we sympathize with you and your family in your loss. But, Mr. Olsen, you must remember this: Your cow had no business being upon our tracks. Those tracks are our private property and when she invaded them, she became a trespasser. Technically speaking, you, as her owner, became a trespasser also. But we have no desire to carry the issue into court and possibly give you trouble. Now then, what would you regard as a fair settlement between you and the railroad company?"

"Vail," said Mr. Olsen slowly, "Ay bane poor Swede farmer, but Ay shall give you fifty dollars."